


Tell Me You Love Me

by Kaapp



Series: Tell Me You Love Me [1]
Category: Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Insecure Mycroft, Internal Monologue, Light Angst, M/M, No Dialogue, Song Inspired, self doubt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2017-10-21
Packaged: 2019-01-20 20:53:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12441588
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kaapp/pseuds/Kaapp
Summary: The internal monologue of Mycroft during a fight with Greg, his thoughts on their relationship and how he thinks he doesn’t deserve him but yet he can’t live without him.





	Tell Me You Love Me

**Author's Note:**

> Hello,  
> thanks for giving this one-shot a try. :)
> 
> This fic was inspired after listening to Demi Lovato’s song: Tell Me You Love me.
> 
> I feel like Mycroft would feel insecure in his relationship with Greg and scared because he knows he is falling deeply in love for the first time.
> 
> But fortunately, Greg is there to help him.

Oh no, here we go again...

 

Fighting over something futile that I said. 

 

_ I’m sorry. _

 

You’re screaming your lungs out at me, mad about what I did, as I stand still, receiving your blows silently, I tell myself I deserve them.

 

I shouldn’t have tried to control you.

 

You’re saying tracking you was unacceptable, but understand, I did it with good intentions.

 

I’ll admit, I let my insecurities get the best of me, my jealousy and possessiveness clouded my mind and my soul as I tried to keep you for myself, afraid that you would flee my company once you discovered all my flaws. 

 

I’m frightened to ever see the day when you will realise how a poor soul mate I can be, but the truth is, I can’t bring myself to let you go,  I can’t stand the thought of you finding happiness with someone else; No, I can’t bear the thought of you leaving me for another.

 

Another reason I wanted to keep you away from the world was because I couldn’t trust myself enough to believe you when you said I was the only one. 

 

I know now that it was a mistake, and maybe, unconsciously, I was looking for trouble so that you would leave me before it got worse, before I loved you way too much. Understand, it wasn’t by pleasure to hurt you I was trying to hide from the possible pain you could bring me.

 

Should I let you go, rather than let you hurt me? 

 

Am I coward enough to chose to give up? 

 

Am I selfish enough to force you to stay? 

 

Believe me, I want to trust you with all my heart.  I do, but I shielded it away for so many years, I protected it with so many layers that I cannot bare myself entirely. I’m afraid, I’m not brave enough yet, please be kind to me, I’ve never given my heart to anyone else. I’m scared of losing hold of it. I never trusted someone like I trust you, though.

 

But I want to trust you entirely, I know it will bring you joy and happiness, I want to give you that. I wish to make you proud of having me on your arm, by your side. I want to return the feelings that you provide me. Although It seems like everything I say, every step I make is the opposite reaction of my intentions.

 

Oh dear, you know I’m not good at love. 

 

Caring is definitively not an advantage. Why must I always be so damn right? 

 

Love made me question myself when I thought I knew everything, I actually knew nothing, especially when it comes to loving you. You are a marvelous teacher as I’m a terrible student. I yearn for your approval, I try to meet your standards, but I don’t know what you see in me. Oh Gregory, what have you done to me?

 

Our fight, however, made me reevaluate our situation, I might be scared of putting my heart on the line but I know I can no longer function without you by my side, I require your love to be human.  So maybe trying to push you away wasn’t the right thing to do. And now, I’m scared of losing the best thing that has ever happened in my life.

 

I sighed at my stupidity. Driving you away from me will do me more harm than good. Either way, it was meant to end badly. Maybe it’s not too late to fix this mess...

 

_ Please, Gregory, forgive me. _

 

I can’t make it through the day knowing that I will come home to an empty house where you no longer live. Please, I can’t bring myself to losing you. I know I failed you, I’ll try my best to earn your forgiveness and your trust.

 

You came to my lonely life with your easy smile and lovely hazel eyes, changed my perception of the world and made me warm inside. 

 

The thing is I don’t know who I am anymore without you. The Iceman is long gone, only remains your love and your affection. Oh yes, I got it bad indeed.

 

I’m completly, insanely and undoubtedly in love with you, Gregory Lestrade.

 

Please, I beg of you, tell me you love me, tell me you are as dependent on me as I am of you. Tell me that your life is meaningless without me, Please scream from the top of your lungs, how much I mean to you. Proclaim that I’m your whole world, as you are mine, let me know if you are as powerless as I am when I’m near you.

 

Oh, tell me you love me, like I love you.

Tell me it will be worth it, tell me it’s forever. 

 

It’s on days like this, when we are fighting that we’ll need those words to keep us afloat, to remind us that we’re in for the best and the worse, that no matter what, we’ll make it through this journey, together. Because I am nothing without you.

 

So tell me, you love me, when we’re fighting over silly things that soon we’ll forget. Tell me you love me. Promise me we’ll be alright. I promise you, we’ll be alright.

 

Let’s stop fighting, I apologise for what I said, the way I acted. I’ll no longer push you back, I promise. 

 

I regret every action that I’ve made in order to make you walk away. I’m nothing without you, so please grant me the honour to spend the rest of my life with you. I don't care about anything else, the world could burn, I wouldn't notice since the only thing I need is standing right in front of me.

 

Now kiss me like there’s no tomorrow, prove me that I made the right choice, tell me how lucky I’m to have you in my life. 

Tell me again how much you love me, I need to hear you say it, hearing those words from your mouth soothe my weakened heart.

 

Tell me you love me, kiss me until dawn, worship my body all night, love me until death, and beyond. Tell me you love me. 

And in the middle of passion, of reconciliation, I ask you to be mine forever and, Oh! what a great pleasure when you answer yes.


End file.
